ARE YOU A DOMINANT OR DO YOU DOMINATE?

One of the questions I am frequently asked is “what’s the difference between “Domination and Dominance”. I tell them that “I can teach anyone how to dominate, but I cannot teach Dominance. Dominance is developed, it’s a presence that one acquires with age, maturity and experience.”

The quote suggests that while one can impart the skills and techniques of domination or leadership to someone else, true dominance is not simply a set of learned behaviors. Instead, it is something that develops over time with maturity and experience. Let’s break down the key points of the quote:

1. Teaching the “how”: The quote acknowledges that it is possible to teach the tactics, strategies, and methods of dominating or leading others. These could include communication skills, decision-making processes, conflict resolution, and more. In various fields, such as business, sports, or the military, there are specific techniques and practices that can be taught to improve one’s ability to take charge.
2. Dominance requires more than knowledge: However, the quote highlights that true dominance goes beyond merely knowing how to take control. It involves a deeper level of understanding and mastery that can only be achieved through personal growth and experience.
3. Development with maturity: Dominance is not something that can be rushed or acquired overnight. It often comes with age and maturity, as individuals gain a better understanding of themselves, others, and the world around them. With maturity, people tend to develop better emotional intelligence, empathy, and perspective, which are essential components of effective leadership.
4. Age and experience matter: As people gain experience in different situations, they encounter various challenges and opportunities for growth. Learning from successes and failures, adapting to different scenarios, and handling adversity contribute to the development of true dominance.
5. Beyond external traits: Dominance is not just about projecting power or authority externally; it involves an internal sense of confidence and self-assurance. True dominance is not based solely on external displays of strength, but on a genuine understanding of one’s capabilities and the ability to inspire and guide others.
6. Context matters: It’s important to note that dominance or leadership style can vary depending on the context and the group of people being led. Effective leaders can adapt their approach to different situations and individuals, understanding that leadership is not a one-size-fits-all concept.

In conclusion, the quote reminds us that while skills and techniques can be taught, true dominance as a leader involves a more profound and nuanced development that comes with age, experience, and a maturation of character. It’s not just about being in control, but about using that influence wisely, empathetically, and with a genuine understanding of the people being led.